


Everything You Deserve

by Anonymous



Category: NU'EST
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-05-29 23:59:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15084590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: It’s push-and-pull, back-and-forth...a constant tension and release.Minhyun just wants Dongho to let him love him, but Dongho isn’t in the mood to make it easy.





	1. Chapter 1

Deep down, Minhyun knows he’s a coward.

Why else would he be in this constant orbit around Dongho, circling around and never really connecting?

Because he’s afraid that once they do collide it would change everything.

So he lies. To himself, to Dongho.

It’s the week before he’s supposed to move to the Wanna One dorms and it would be the best time, wouldn’t it, to finally say _something_.

Instead it’s Dongho.

“I know it’s selfish,” Dongho says, “And you’ll have a lot more to think about soon. I’d just rather say this now and get it over with.”

”Say what, Dongho-yah?” Minhyun _knows_. As much as he can feel the rapid quickening of his own pulse.

”I...” Dongho looks at him for a long while before gently reaching over, from where he’s sitting next to him on their shared bed.

Minhyun stills as he feels Dongho’s hand on his jaw, gently pulling his face closer to Dongho’s. The kiss is soft, fleeting - more a brush of lips than anything.

Already Minhyun misses the touch, the feel of it.

”You have feelings for me?” Minhyun asks. Dongho nods.

When Minhyun says he doesn’t feel the same way, they both know he’s lying.

The memory of the kiss haunts him at night. Try as he might to recreate that feeling, tasting other lips does nothing but make him compare the experience with the kiss that was more confession than anything else.

At least having to be physically apart from Nu’est makes it a little easier to bear. The others do try their best to keep him in the loop with texts and calls. 

He doesn’t hear from Dongho for over a month.

When he finally does call, they talk as if though nothing had changed. Light, easy chatter though there’s really so much more underneath. 

_Have you eaten?_

_Are you well?_

_Are they letting you sleep?_

Dongho lets him hear snippets of the songs but won’t let him hear them all until they’re properly finished.

”Instead of writing love songs, we’re writing songs about you. You’re going to need a crane soon to lift your head,” Aron jokes.

Minhyun laughs. Yet there’s a hollowness to it, the general weirdness of their situation is hard to grasp. To have to act as though they’re not a big part of his life is the hardest role he’s had to play.

When he hears the finished product, he’s so proud of them. So proud of Dongho. He thinks of the nights Dongho had dragged him to the studio, of watching him tinker with beats and melodies.

Lyrics, Minhyun can do. But Dongho’s musicality is something to admire.   
  
“Why’d you arrange it that way, Dongho-yah?”   
  
“Well, the chord progression works this way see? But it would be more interesting if I tweak it like this.”

It was funny that Dongho, self-admittedly, wasn’t a fan of book learning. But the underpinnings of music theory? Harmonies? Minhyun liked calling Dongho stupid a lot but when it came to making music, Minhyun never felt more clueless than when he was trying to understand what Dongho and Bumzu were talking about.

”Dongho has a great ear,” Bumzu said to him once. “He really has a knack at vocal arrangements, contrasts and complementary vocal tones.”

Minhyun nodded though not quite understanding (at the time) what that all meant. Until he listened, and re-listened to the many things Dongho would cook up. Dongho, always so patient at explaining his musical choices.

Though W.Here was pretty darn good, Minhyun thought that it wasn’t the best Dongho could come up with. Because he’d seen what he could do first-hand.

And then he’d heard Who,You which pretty much confirmed what Minhyun had always thought: Dongho was a genius.

 


	2. Chapter 2

_It was so dark...you could see the stars._

Minhyun hadn’t expected it to hurt, reading and listening to Dongho talk about the song he wrote. _In the news._

He’d mentioned very little about his trip to Saipan to Minhyun. 

“I’ll be going to Saipan next month, Minhyun-ah. Bumzu says it’ll be a nice change.”  
  
”Am sure you’ll have fun.”

”Yeah. I will.” 

Minhyun didn’t hear anything from him during that entire trip.

No pictures. 

Not even a “Hey, I’m back,” text.

When he watched the first stage, he could see them all singing but in his mind all he could hear was Dongho’s voice.

_All the stars for you for you for you_

He played the song on repeat to sleep that night.

***

The day the album dropped, Jonghyun texted him a short, cryptic message.

”You know this is as close to a love letter as he’ll get, right?”

Minhyun stared at the text for awhile, not quite trusting himself to be honest with the answer.

”Yes.” All he could bring himself to say.

”Think about what you’re going to do about it these three months while you’re away.”

And Minhyun did. 

When he wasn’t busy with rehearsals, he was thinking _a lot_. 

He’d taken to texting Dongho once a day. Sending him a picture, every day.

Not a lot of pictures, just one a day, fairly innocuous with bland captions.

_The pancakes here are great, you’d like them_.

_Stopped by the sea for a bit - it was healing_.

_Saw this shirt I think you’d like. Expect something in your mailbox._

He kept the thread of photos, backed it up, a virtual diary of what he called his own little ‘love letter diary’.

Hoping that Dongho would read in the texts and pictures what he really meant to say.

_I miss you._

_I think about you, all the time._

_Wait for me._

 


	3. Chapter 3

Dongho rarely replies.

The most Minhyun gets is an indication that Dongho has seen his messages. And he doesn’t call soon after, either. 

His ‘Love Letter’ thread feels as though he’s talking to himself, what with the sporadic texts Dongho sends in return.

”Good luck today.”

“We’ll be heading to XX radio show, you can tune in if you have time.”

Dongho’s texts are frustratingly impersonal unlike their old texts that had Dongho spamming him with ridiculous KakaoTalk stickers and Minhyun responding with equal silliness.

_I deserve this, I guess._

Dongho’s birthday is coming up but he knows the members and his hyungs will have their own plans for him.

So he needs his own. After everyone else gets their turn. If Dongho wants to be petty, play hard to get, then Minhyun will just have to use that.

”Jonghyun-ah?”

”Minhyun? Anything up?”

He calmly tells Jonghyun what he needs and the people Jonghyun will need to talk to, to help make his plan happen.

Jonghyun quietly laughs at him over the phone.

”Took you long enough to find your courage.”

”Shut up,” he says, voice devoid of malice.

“Don’t worry about a thing, Minhyun-ah. I’ll get it sorted. You just cover things on your end.”

What Minhyun needs is a car. He begs his sister to sort out a rental and Jonghyun calls in a few favours for some other things he needs.

He tells his agency he’s spending quality time with family.

Nu’est is his family after all.

He waits in the car outside the restaurant where he knows Dongho is having a birthday gathering with his closest hyungs.

His phone beeps.

_We’re bringing him out to you. Plate number ********* right?_

Barely a minute after he replies, there’s a  tap on the passenger seat window. 

He hears laughter, Dongho’s puzzled voice asking why they’re out there.

Minhyun swallows and presses the button to lower the window. 

“Thanks hyungs, for the help!” He smiles brightly at Dongho’s friends. 

“Get in, loser.” He reaches over, to open the door for Dongho.

Dongho is standing there, face with that dumbfounded expression that Minhyun found both adorable and, on more than one occasion, extremely exasperating.

”Minhyun, what...”

”Shh. I’m kidnapping you. Jonghyun’s packed your stuff, it’s in the back. The guys will help cover for you the next few days...”

”...days?”

Minhyun huffed. 

“I didn’t go through all this trouble to just borrow you for a night, OK?”

Dongho sat himself in the car. Looked over at Minhyun, raising an eyebrow.

”I know you like spontaneous trips so well, happy birthday, idiot.”

Dongho’s answering laugh is all the motivation Minhyun needs to step on the gas and head to, well, where they’re headed.

The way he’s feeling right now, though, he’d drive to the moon and back to hear that laugh. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes: Minhyun's plan isn't executed on Dongho's birthday itself - since obviously W1 is on tour then.   
> My headcanon is he plans with Dongho's hyungs for them to have a belated birthday meetup with him during the short break in his tour schedule.


	4. Chapter 4

“You like it?” Minhyun looked over at Dongho, a slight nervousness swelling inside him.

Jonghyun had found the place, after asking around for a location that was a drive away but private.

It was a serene, privately-owned villa - Jonghyun had made the arrangements for him, sending over all the information by email.

The owner had dealt enough with celebrities to know how to be discreet. Minhyun hadn’t needed to meet up with him personally, instead picking up the keys from a lockbox. 

“Not bad,” Dongho had said. 

Not that long ago, a pettier, dumber Minhyun would be annoyed by that and would have gone on a long diatribe about the effort it took to secure the house.

This Minhyun opted to just sigh and take Dongho’s hand.

”Come on, let’s get our things inside.”

As per request, the fridge had been stocked with items Minhyun had picked out. Stuff for them to snack on or whip up light meals with; he’d pre-arranged a few meals to be sent over the next couple of days as well. He wanted to avoid eating out with all the gawking and phone cameras.

Minhyun just wanted to be selfish for a while, have Dongho all to himself for a change. If they needed air, there was a nearby private beach or they could always just go out for a drive.

Arriving a little late at night also meant less chance to be seen, especially out where they were.

The house had two bedrooms, a nice, modern kitchen and a comfy enough living room with a view, as well as a connecting balcony.

“You should probably take the master room,” Minhyun said. “It’s bigger, and has a huge bed.”

Dongho just looked at him. “I thought we’d be sharing the room?”

Minhyun was sure he’d just felt his heart stop for a minute there.

He shrugged. “That could work too.”

They’d made some small talk on the two hour drive there but Minhyun had done his best to keep things light.

He had _hopes_ , but no expectations.

All he wanted was, when it came down to it, to spend some time with his favourite person. To make up for being away, for being too scared to be honest about what they were.

Minhyun just wanted to tell Dongho he was ready now, to see if they, this could go somewhere. And if it took them literally having to go somewhere together to figure it out, so be it.

Right now he was just content enough to be able to sleep with Dongho near. It had been too long.

Still it did feel a little awkward to be sharing one big bed with Dongho, after being stuck alternating between dorm bunk beds and hotel beds on tour.

He scooted next to Dongho before deciding to just, casually put an arm around him. As he used to do. 

It still felt awkward enough he felt the need to ask,”This OK, Dongho-yah?”

Dongho half-mumbled an assenting reply.

The room was dark but not dark enough for Minhyun not to be able to look at Dongho’s face. As his sight adjusted, he found himself cataloguing with his eyes the little details of the other’s features, trying to see if anything had changed.

Their new stylist seemed to be a lot better at grooming Dongho’s brows - the others would either do too much or too little. He ran his thumb slightly along Dongho’s jawline - it looked as though he’d lost quite a lot of weight. Almost as much as he did during Produce 101 and it made Minhyun’s heart ache a little.

Otherwise, his lashes were still as long as he’d remembered. His fingers itched to touch the bridge of Dongho’s nose, make their way down the curve and possibly brush the tops of Dongho’s lips.

It was enough though, to gaze at Dongho’s sleeping face and listen to the sound of his breathing.

Except Dongho wasn’t sleeping.

 _Oh_.

One eye was open. Wide-open and staring at him.

”If you want to kiss me, you might as well get on with it. Or I could just go back to sleep.”

The slight note of challenge in Dongho’s voice made Minhyun want to laugh, and also made him want to answer it by making sure neither of them got that much sleep that night.

Well, then.

 _Might as well get on it with it_ , he thought, as he tugged Dongho closer, a lot closer to him.

It was too dark to tell but he thought he could see the slightest ghost of a smirk on Dongho’s lips as he closed on them with his own.

 


	5. Chapter 5

This was just how he’d imagined it, all those nights away in the Wanna One dorms.

His hand at Dongho’s nape, fingers in his hair, Dongho’s lips where he wanted them - on his.

Languid, slow kisses. The briefest, tiniest breaths between the touch of their lips. 

Dongho seemed content enough to let Minhyun kiss him thoroughly, kissing him back but not moving a muscle otherwise.

For once, Minhyun wasn’t going to complain about doing all the work.

”Mmm...Min?”

The befuddled expression on Dongho’s face when Minhyun moved away was just too cute.

Much as he would have liked to coo over it a little longer, he had other business to attend to.

Minhyun moved over to the side table, flicking the switch on one of the bedside lamps.

”Why’d you turn on the light?” Now Dongho was sounding grumpy. Still cute, but grumpy.

”To see you, silly.”

Dongho’s t-shirt and boxers had to go. But he’d get to them eventually.

Instead he scooted right to the end of the bed, positioning himself right behind where Dongho’s heels lay.

Kneeling, his hands went to where Dongho’s ankles were, lightly stroking the sides but his gaze was fixed on Dongho’s eyes.

Eyes that were looking at him, curiously.

”I missed you,” Minhyun said. 

Dongho smirked. “I know.”

Any other time, he’d kiss that smart ass mouth quiet but Minhyun had _plans_.

Ignoring Dongho’s wisecrack, Minhyun continued. 

“I missed everything. Your voice. Your stupid laugh. Your stupid jokes. Missed everything about you.”

His hands were gripping tightly onto Dongho’s ankles now.

”When I missed you the most, I’d close my eyes and just imagined you were there. Right next to me. Imagined every single detail, fantasised about just how and where I’d touch you.”

Minhyun waited. Even now, he still felt the doubts in his mind. Did Dongho want this as much as he did? Did Dongho feel that same want that haunted his nights, sometimes even his days - the days when he wasn’t too tired to think of anything besides his crazy schedules.

Still, Dongho didn’t move. Or say a thing. 

Well if Dongho wanted to play games, Minhyun decided to choose one where they’d both win.

”Do you want me to show you, Dongho-yah? Do you want to - will you let me?”

The silence that followed had Minhyun holding his breath for what seemed like an eon, when really it was maybe ten seconds.

All Dongho said was: “OK.”

That, Minhyun decided, was enough.


	6. Chapter 6

“OK.”

The ghost of a smirk still lingered on Dongho’s lips. 

Minhyun knew Dongho well enough, long enough, to understand that underneath the calm and lack of banter he was being challenged.

He had a lot to make up for, and not just time.

It wasn’t like Dongho not to forgive Minhyun anything, to not want to please him, to not give into him. 

But Dongho hated being lied to. And Minhyun had done just that.

Now wasn’t the time for excuses or apologies.

Words weren’t going to be enough; not this time.

He’d just have to kiss it better.

Starting with...”Minhyun-ah! What...what are you doing?” 

Dongho’s voice sounded as if caught between amusement and befuddlement.

”I’m kissing your feet.”

He started where he had placed his own hands on Dongho’s ankles. Kissing slowly down the outer sides, then kissing each single toe in turn.

In response, he could hear Dongho barely suppressing a giggle.

Dongho wasn’t laughing, though, when Minhyun swiped his tongue along a heel. 

“I missed hearing the sound of your footsteps in the dorm. Didn’t matter how many people...I always knew it was you from the sound, the way you walk.”

Minhyun’s hands continued caressing along the top of Dongho’s feet.

”Sometimes I’d dream that I’d look up from my bunk, see your feet right next to the bed. And know you were there.”

He let his fingers move up, this time gently stroking along Dongho’s calves.

”Remember when you got that bad cramp and yelled so loud, you woke everyone up? You made me massage your calf just so you could go back to sleep.”

He kissed both Dongho’s calves, quickly, sharply, just below the knees.

”I missed that so much - just touching you, feeling your muscles underneath my hands.”

Dongho’s breath caught a little when Minhyun’s hands started wandering up the other man’s inner thighs. 

This time it was Minhyun smirking.

”Your thighs are so big, Dongho-yah. So nice to hold onto, so nice to grip...sometimes I just want to...bite,” he allowed himself the faintest scrape of teeth along the nearest thigh, revelling at the soft groan he got in response.

From the state of Dongho’s boxers, Minhyun knew he was getting to Dongho - even if the latter wasn’t going to say it.

He let a finger sneak slightly below the waistband, tracing the curve of Dongho’s hipbone.  
  
”I love looking at your waist; love holding onto it because you’re so nice to wrap my arms around, Dongho-ya,” he said as his hands flattened right above Dongho’s waistband, moving underneath Dongho’s shirt.

Then he tugged, bringing the cloth up, up past Dongho’s neck, over his head. Leaving just Dongho in his boxers, that looked as though they were getting a little tight.

”God, I love your chest,” Minhyun exclaimed. His palms were resting just over where Dongho’s tattoos were. “I love when your tattoos peek out of your shirt, or when I can see them when you take off your shirt.”

He kissed along the outlines of both tattoos, then down the centre, right to where Dongho’s belly was.

”I love your stomach. I love it when it’s flat, and tight - I love it when it’s soft and you have that cute little belly. I just love having it touching mine.”

Minhyun had lowered himself down now, from previously hovering just over Dongho, their bodies not quite touching.

He’d lost his own shirt along the way and he revelled in the feel of them being skin-to-skin now - chest to chest, heartbeat meeting heartbeat.

Feeling Dongho’s heartbeat beat as rapidly as his own was a victory Minhyun was only too happy to claim.

Minhyun lowered his head to Dongho’s neck, kissing down the side then back up to an ear, lightly nibbling at the lobe.

”I think about _this_ all the time, _you_ all the time. You make me so crazy, Dongho-yah.” 

“So please,” he whispered. “Understand...I was just, so, scared. Not of you, never of you. Scared of myself, scared of how much I want you.”

His lips were back on the side of Dongho’s jaw, still forcing himself to keep things as slow as he could stand.

”I’m not afraid anymore, so, please...please Dongho-yah...” 

Dongho interrupted him with a loud sigh. 

“You still talk too much,” he grumbled. This time he followed his words with his hands gripping tightly onto Minhyun’s back, his lips meeting Minhyun’s with force and longing.

Dongho’s hands were moving, down, down to Minhyun’s own shorts and the next thing Minhyun knew, he felt a strong hand grip around his own very painfully erect member.

 _This wasn’t part of the plan_.

”Dongho, no, let me...” But Dongho was always a fan of ruining Minhyun’s carefully prepared routines. Dongho had one arm firmly around Minhyun’s waist, and another hand quite intent on the very serious business of getting Minhyun off.

Any further protests Minhyun had were silenced by Dongho’s tongue in his mouth, and his bruising kisses.

Dongho’s thumb was on the the tip of Minhyun’s cock, rubbing the end with Minhyun’s own pre-cum. He alternated swirling the tip, with firm sharp strokes and Minhyun knew he couldn’t last much longer.

Minhyun moaned into Dongho’s mouth, finally giving into the overwhelming sensation, until he finally came hard, jerking forward in Dongho’s grip.

The smirk on Dongho’s face had returned and Minhyun was too wiped out to be annoyed by it. Instead, he said, “This was supposed to be about you.”

”You know me,” Dongho replied. _Always doing things for me, Dongho-ya_. 

“Just let me...finish what I started.”

Minhyun was a big believer in crossing off lists. And right at the top of his list was sucking Dongho off.

Slapping Dongho’s hands away (gently), he wasted no time yanking Dongho’s boxers down and yes, there it was, just begging for release.

The sound of Dongho’s groaning when his lips enveloped the tip was gratifying to say the least...as was how much louder Dongho got when he took the rest in, letting his tongue swirl around the sides - licking, sucking as one hand gripped the base of Dongho’s cock.

He knew Dongho was close, so he took note of every gasp, anything that made Dongho jerk forward a little harder. Because Minhyun was pretty sure he was getting as much practice with this during their little break.

Dongho’s fingers were now firmly gripping Minhyun’s hair, as he too was moving and Minhyun felt, that small telltale swell, that told him Dongho was about to come. 

And he did, and even though he tried moving away Minhyun wasn’t about to let him - instead closing his eyes as he felt Dongho come in his mouth.

When Minhyun opened his eyes, the gaze he was met with was a far different one from when they’d stated. Gentler, and maybe filled a little with wonderment.

”Come on,” Minhyun gave Dongho one last kiss. “Shower?”

Dongho nodded, smiling.

As they lay there, spooning (Dongho liked being the little spoon - Minhyun was so much taller, after all), Minhyun felt the tiniest bit guilty. It was Dongho’s birthday but it felt as though he was the one being rewarded.

”Minhyun?”

”Yeah?”

”My birthday...this year was great. But you made it perfect. Thank you.”

Dongho was sleepy and tired out; he wouldn’t be so mushy otherwise.

Not that Minhyun was about to complain. “You’re welcome, Dongho-yah. Good night, I love you.”

Dongho replied with a sleepy, sheepishly-mumbled reply that sounded suspiciously like an ‘I love you too’.

They could deal with the feelings stuff after breakfast, Minhyun decided. Right now he had everything he wanted and that, that was more than good enough.

 

 


End file.
